Welp, next Thursday is Turkey Day, the annual “celebration” of a pretend history and traditions from the 1900s, when millions of American families will pretend that it’s perfectly OK for women to create the celebrations, decorations and meals whilst men eat and watch football.

Not us, at least not entirely. We’ll be watching the Purina National Dog Show. It’s just Mom and me and we don’t have big appetites, so I’ll just saute a couple turkey thighs, make cornbread dressing (day before), bourbon gravy, and green bean casserole (day before). I already have cranberry-orange-walnut relish that I made earlier and froze (the first half went into a loaf of bread). For dessert, cherry-topped cheesecake with Oreo crust, our fave. That’s it! Most of it made ahead, and our big meal at suppertime so we can watch the Dog Show uninterrupted.

I am a little disappointed that the Purina site doesn’t say more about the handlers. They are the reason dogs win — and enjoy the experience!